The Joke
"I am not important."
"I am not wanted."
"I am not good enough."
"I am not loved."
"I am not understood."
"I am a failure."
"I am bad daughter."
"I am ugly.”
“I am stupid."
This is a joke because when you think about it - it’s funny because they are not true. These are lies, stories or excuses that we tell ourselves to get out of doing things that needs to be done and gets us stuck in the stories of I CANNOT!
These lies became our negative beliefs when we were younger to make sense of things that don’t make sense, which allowed us to cope with both the challenges and easefulness of growing up.
The good news is that these lies moulded us to be the person we are today - the good and bad; and if left unchecked, will hold us back from standing in our own power.
Here I am, older, wiser, beautiful, confident, and I’m still telling myself these lies.
Doubt creeps in. The feelings that come up will be sadness, embarrassment, shame, guilt and I become defensive, apologetic and very small. I don’t dare do things, because I am afraid I will suck at it. I look for people for approval. I'm afraid to speak out for fear of saying the wrong thing. I plan things to perfection to “just-in-case” bad things happen. And I believe this lie so much so, that outwardly I start to behave badly too.
I’ve been working on catching the lies when they come up, which can be within a couple of minutes and sometimes weeks/months!!
If not for the work I’ve done in my yoga teacher training with Power Living and Baptiste Yoga, I would not have been aware of my lies. I would not have delved into managing my trigger points and have the awareness to pause and choose not to listen to these lies.
“Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate, but that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us.”
Truthfully, I’m afraid that I can be powerful and I wouldn't what to do with it. Because I've not been powerful in my 40 years of living on this earth. Yes there is some defining moments but most of the time, I fall back on my default patterns because it is what I've been doing everyday and it’s damn easy to hide behind my lies. But what if, I am successful? What if I am I can transform lives? What if I can be bigger than myself and change the words I say to myself.
I am beautiful.
I am important.
I am wanted.
I am loved.
I am understood.
I am good enough.
The truth is we can’t get rid of the lies because it’s already ingrained in our DNA. But we can learn to manage it by finding a new way of being. Only if we are ready to get out of our own way. Only if we are willing to do the work.
The answer is all inside. The lies lie in our head and our real self lies in our heart.
Get out of your head.
Have courage.
You've got it.
Courage.
It's all on the inside.
The answers are all in your heart.
Where in your life are you playing small? If anything is possible, what would you do?
