I was a sceptic. but this year, the magic of manifestation gave me a new corporate yoga class to teach and won me a free Logitech camera. I'm serious! And I didn’t even ask Santa for it.
Let’s start from the beginning of the story.
Photo by Vinicius Wiesehofer on Unsplash
Abundance
It all started with my first blog post of 2023, which you can read here, where I thought I had settled on my Word for 2023- Abundance.
Actually it started earlier than that - I was already repeating this affirmation daily -
I am grateful for all the joy, love and abundance that will bring me today.
I am open to receive and I’m ready.
Was I manifesting abundance? I don't know. I had no expectations on the outcome. If it happens, it happens. I mean, have you read the book “The Secret” ? I did a lifetime ago. And maybe it worked for some and it didn't work for me, at that time.
Manifestations vs Affirmations
But manifestations are like affirmations, which is a practice I wholeheartedly believe in because it helps us heal from the inside out. It helps shift our perspectives from negative to a more loving and kinder energy, which can give us more peace and calm as we move our way through the bumpy road of life.
And in affirming what we want, what we want to be, what we want to feel, who we are - similarly to manifestations - we are sending a message out to the universe. We are putting our desires and the good loving energy that we want out there.
Surrender
Then, in that same blog post, I talked about re-discovering Gabby Bernstein (I had her books) and I discovered newly - her “Dear Gabby” podcasts.
One of her episodes carried so much gems that I'm dedicating a whole entire post to it for next month’s post. (I’ll put a link here once it’s complete.) But one thing she said triggered me, which was the word -
Surrender!
#truthbomb To be honest with you, when I was contemplating my Word for 2023 - Surrender was the first word that came up for me. But I was hesitant to declare and live from it because I find it hard to let go of control when so much of my life was uncertain. And what I felt was a sense of shame and so I chose an ‘easier word’ aka Abundance. And that's my secret out of the bag!
Surrendering , according to Patanjali, a yoga sage “ is a pathway to Peace in the mind as well as in the heart.” (Yoga sutra 1.23 Isvara - pranidhanad va)
He also talked about when you surrender to a higher power be it God, or the Divine or the universe, it is the ultimate action to give you tranquility of the mind and paves the waves to blissfulness and peace. (Yoga sutra 2.45 Samadhi siddhih ishvarapranidhana).
And so what Gabby said resonates:
“When you surrender you let the universe catch up to your dreams. Just let go and and allow the universe to care for you”
surrendering in a new way
When I think about my year so far, I realised that I was unconsciously Surrendering, because in doing what I was doing everyday, saying those words, putting faith into something that it's not tangible, if it's not faith and if it's not surrendering, I don't know what that is.
I mean I’ve done a lot inner work on surrendering before, more intensively when I was going through IVF - one really needs to surrender to the uncertainties of not knowing. I thought I did surrender but in a way, I also wanted to be in control of whatever I could control and to plan; what with my rigid supplements schedule, self-care to do list and ultimately, I let my fertility life get in the way of living my fullest life.
I used to tell me myself "Everything will be okay. If it’s not okay, it'll be okay. I’m a survivor." But the journey from “Okay to NOT okay”, I’m controlling a lot of things. Oh. Dear. #lightbulbmoment
Gabby says this also:
"When you think you have surrendered, surrender some more."
Boom!
The surrendering feels different this time. It feels softer. gentler, and unassuming and not at all, stifling and like there is so much space. Literally I'm not doing anything at all, which is a revelation because I'm doing so much. And there’s this feeling of “I've done all I can now. I'm out.”
I'm not really giving up on my desires but I'm just letting it go.
Stop believing, Start Deciding
So I want to believe that manifesting works! As I mentioned earlier, I didn't ask for the 2 wins. I didn't "put teaching more classes" or "winning a camera" on my 2023 Possibilities List, not that I think it's not possible, but it's a material want and I don't need it but I will happily receive.
Maybe the word is not “believe”! Kelly McHugh, my yoga coach and founder of Digital Yoga Academy said this -
"It's not just to believe it's possible, you decide it's possible."
It’s like, instead of saying "everything will be okay"; say: Everything is okay.
Right?
Instead of saying "all will be well", say All is well.
Instead of saying, I will be a mother, say I am a Mother.
It’s more than being positive. It’s about changing the words you say to yourself, and shifting your mindset.
I'm saying all this, trying not to believe but deciding and trusting that EVERYTHING IS OKAY. YES, I HAVE A GREAT HUSBAND, BEAUTIFUL HOME, MY FAMILY IS HEALTHY. I AM AT PEACE. I AM SAFE. I AM HEALTHY AND HAPPY.
My takeaway
My takeaway from all of this is to I need to surrender more. I need to let go of what Abundance look like. And that manifestation is possible when I surrender.
Journaling Prompt
Whether you believe in manifestations or not, try these journaling prompts:
What is it that you really want to make happen, that hasn’t happen, that you don’t say out loud?
If surrendering is not about giving up your goals or desires but letting go of the outcome, what is possible for you if you surrender? What will it feel like?
“You don’t have to surrender but if you want to stop worrying or suffering, you can choose to surrender. ”